went to the work do tonight, it was okay. everyone at work turns out to be a crazy neurotic mentalist while pissed, unsurprisingly.

in some sort of crazy david lynch style character swap way, i appear to have had my flatmate Hani replaced with some other middle eastern dude called Muhammed. really, is islam the least original religion in the world or what? at least 50% of all the muslims i've met so far have been called muhammed. this seems a bit odd to me. still, i guess you get christians called, er, christian, or chris, or whatever. so maybe it's not that odd. and crazy spaniards called jesus. ah well.

anyway i came back from work today to find mohammed praying to mecca in my front room. this was a little awkward, though in hindsight useful as i now know what direction mecca is. it is towards my cd collection.

came back tonight and mohammed was still here, and hani isn't, mohammed has now gone to bed in hani's room. MAYBE HANI NEVER EXISTED. i could have imagined him all along. this would be good as i owe him five quid.

muhammed told me about how he used to be a taxi driver in new york. he said america was good but the immigration people were evil, i ingratiated myself by saying i thought george bush was a retard

ps tonight i ate some leaves